This one is my favorite topic and I ain't got anything to be ashame of on this topic.
Once you finish reading, you will understand.
Disability and Aids. What do I mean by Aids? I don't mean hearing aids. So what do I mean by Aids. I mean things that give supports to help the disability be Enabled. Without the Aids, the person would feel they are missing something to support them.
Well, what kind of Aids am I talking about? Any kind of Aids such as Hearing Aids, walking sticks, canes, crutches, scooters, wheelchairs, glasses and so on.
Any of those things that is use to help the person be Enabled. A hearing aid is use so the person can hear sounds and perhaps help in communications. That doesn't mean the person is hearing but helps the person in genereally in communication or understanding with the noises. Walking sticks or Canes, or Scooter or wheelchair are use to help the person be able to move around instead of not moving anywhere. Without those things, the person can't move. Glasses to read and to see things. Without glasses, the eyes can't help some people to see, or to read or to do anything with their eyes. I am not talking about without glasses the person is blind. I am talking about people who need glasses to help aid in using their eyes for whatever purpose.
One of the greatest aids I have are the hearing aid and a Cane. The hearing aid helps me with my communication needs. The Cane helps me to walk around in many different places. Without the cane, I am afraid to fall or lose my walking balance because of my Cerebral Palsy. There are places that aren't flat and smooth that I am afraid I could fall. For example, curb on the streets, gravel roads, or grass that has bumps and not smooth. Without the cane, those are some of the kind of area I would be afraid to walk without a cane. Having that Cane makes me feel good and safe.
If you need an aids to help you feel better and Enabled. Use it. Don't be ashame of using it. Don't worry what others may think of you for using it. There are people who understand why you are using the aids and respect you. Those kind of people would help you when they understand what you are using. Like at work, when I use the Cane, people would open the door for me and I would say Thank you. Those who don't understand what you are using as Aids may either ask you about it or simply ignore you or laugh. If they laugh, they are the ones that will learn the hard way someday that they wish they never did laugh. I am not saying they could end up usin the same Aids but will learn from other people they know very closely that uses the same aids. They will learn from them and look back thinking they wish they have not laughed in the first place. Life is tough and life has many lessons to learn from.
So be proud of whatever Aids you are using. It will make you a better and Enabled Person.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Saturday, October 18, 2008
Disability and Self Esteem...
My last blog talks about Disability and Not Married. This topic talks about
Disability and Self Esteem.
Some people with Disability have no problem with their self esteem. They are happy,
positive, and accept themselves as they are. They have no problem communicating
with people. They have no problem socialized. They tend to have a sense of humor
that makes them stay happy about themselves and to cheer other people as well. They
don't let their disability interfere with their self esteem and are successful.
Other people with disability with low esteem tends to have problems. They are not
happy, they are not positive about themselves as they are. They tend to feel negative
about themselves. They tend to feel down and low about themselves. They tend to feel
bad about their disability and feel it gets in a way of how they feel.
When I was at National Technical Institute for the Deaf (NTID), I was a sophomore.
A woman from Wisconsin came to learn more about deaf people with disability at
NTID. She interview me and another student about how we were doing at NTID. I told
her I was doing fine. She ask me how do I handle school with my Cerebral Palsy and deafness. I told her I have no problem dealing with education along with my Cerebral Palsy. She told me she had a client that time that was in a wheelchair. She told me that her client has negative thoughts and very low self esteem. She said her client even has problem doing her school work especially Math. She said her client thinks she can't do anything successfully because of her Cerebral Palsy. In another words, her client does not have positive attitude about herself. I was shock and sadness when I hear about her client. I told her that I have positive attitude about myself and always think positive. I told her to tell her client to think positive and to be positive about herself. Part of me wish that I thought about asking her to go to Wisconsin to talk with her client about her low self esteem. I never did ask but I wish I did. I know I can't turn the time back and tell her that. I was so busy that time focusing on my education at NTID.
I know there are people out there with disability that has low self esteem. It is not just as simple as taking the person to the gas station and fill them up with a special gas called "High Self Esteem" like High Octane to solve their esteem problem. It does take patient and work help the person self esteem problem. It takes lots of positive communication and lot of encouragement to help the person improves their self esteem. It could also require counseling because it involves communications and how to deal with different feelings involving the person self esteem. The communication itself has to be Open Communication with no criticizing or negative feedback. For example, suppose the client can't shot a basketball through the hoop. You can't say "You are not thinking right or you are not shooting the correct way" like in a wrong way that could discourage the client to shot the basketball again. They feel that kind of message tells them they will never be able to make another basketball shot into the hoop. It is best to say something like,
"That is good shot and you try". "Can I help you or give you some suggestion to improve shooting the basketball into the hoop?" A positive encouragement and a positive help makes the person feels better with positive support. A positive feedback makes them feel good that they are trying. After a while, the person will make the basketball shot through the hoop with positive encouragement. They will feel good that they made the shot.
That kind of suggestion I mention can apply to anything that the person with disability is trying to do well. The same can go for when the person is doing Math, Art or whatever the person is doing. A positive communication and positive encouragement will help them get better. They might not get the Math successful as it might not be their area but they will learn that they try with positive words. They will know with positive feeling that some other people can't do math well but are successful. For example, Elbert Einstein could do complicated things but was
unfamiliar with some math that he never understood. So there are people that can't do things well but have skills for other area.
Any disability with low self esteem should try to change that attitude with positive thoughts and positive encouragement from other people. They should be told from others that people love them regardless of their disability. They should feel that other care about them and they are a wonderful person no matter what. All those positive saying, positive support, and positive encouragement will help the person. Always have the open communication and help them. After a while, when they get to be successful, they won't worry about their low self esteem because they have change it to a Positive or High Self Esteem. They won't think about those low self esteem once they are successful. They will be happy to be successful with people around that that loves, support and encourage them to be success. I had all of that that made me successful at NTID. I had my family, friends, and many different people that help me be successful.
With the high self esteem I have, I have successfully gotten a High School Diploma even with 11 out of 12 years in Special education grades. I also have two different college degrees: AAS degree in Data Processing at NTID which is now called Applied Computer Technology even through they have different courses now and BS degree from Gallaudet University in Computer Information System. I am also married for 17 years with two children. So my Cerebral Palsy is never in the way of my self esteem with all those support and where I am today.
I hope this blog helps other with their self esteem and get help to be successful. Never let their self esteem get in the way of being a successful person. Since I have high self esteem, the others can to with all the things I mention in this blog.
Disability and Self Esteem.
Some people with Disability have no problem with their self esteem. They are happy,
positive, and accept themselves as they are. They have no problem communicating
with people. They have no problem socialized. They tend to have a sense of humor
that makes them stay happy about themselves and to cheer other people as well. They
don't let their disability interfere with their self esteem and are successful.
Other people with disability with low esteem tends to have problems. They are not
happy, they are not positive about themselves as they are. They tend to feel negative
about themselves. They tend to feel down and low about themselves. They tend to feel
bad about their disability and feel it gets in a way of how they feel.
When I was at National Technical Institute for the Deaf (NTID), I was a sophomore.
A woman from Wisconsin came to learn more about deaf people with disability at
NTID. She interview me and another student about how we were doing at NTID. I told
her I was doing fine. She ask me how do I handle school with my Cerebral Palsy and deafness. I told her I have no problem dealing with education along with my Cerebral Palsy. She told me she had a client that time that was in a wheelchair. She told me that her client has negative thoughts and very low self esteem. She said her client even has problem doing her school work especially Math. She said her client thinks she can't do anything successfully because of her Cerebral Palsy. In another words, her client does not have positive attitude about herself. I was shock and sadness when I hear about her client. I told her that I have positive attitude about myself and always think positive. I told her to tell her client to think positive and to be positive about herself. Part of me wish that I thought about asking her to go to Wisconsin to talk with her client about her low self esteem. I never did ask but I wish I did. I know I can't turn the time back and tell her that. I was so busy that time focusing on my education at NTID.
I know there are people out there with disability that has low self esteem. It is not just as simple as taking the person to the gas station and fill them up with a special gas called "High Self Esteem" like High Octane to solve their esteem problem. It does take patient and work help the person self esteem problem. It takes lots of positive communication and lot of encouragement to help the person improves their self esteem. It could also require counseling because it involves communications and how to deal with different feelings involving the person self esteem. The communication itself has to be Open Communication with no criticizing or negative feedback. For example, suppose the client can't shot a basketball through the hoop. You can't say "You are not thinking right or you are not shooting the correct way" like in a wrong way that could discourage the client to shot the basketball again. They feel that kind of message tells them they will never be able to make another basketball shot into the hoop. It is best to say something like,
"That is good shot and you try". "Can I help you or give you some suggestion to improve shooting the basketball into the hoop?" A positive encouragement and a positive help makes the person feels better with positive support. A positive feedback makes them feel good that they are trying. After a while, the person will make the basketball shot through the hoop with positive encouragement. They will feel good that they made the shot.
That kind of suggestion I mention can apply to anything that the person with disability is trying to do well. The same can go for when the person is doing Math, Art or whatever the person is doing. A positive communication and positive encouragement will help them get better. They might not get the Math successful as it might not be their area but they will learn that they try with positive words. They will know with positive feeling that some other people can't do math well but are successful. For example, Elbert Einstein could do complicated things but was
unfamiliar with some math that he never understood. So there are people that can't do things well but have skills for other area.
Any disability with low self esteem should try to change that attitude with positive thoughts and positive encouragement from other people. They should be told from others that people love them regardless of their disability. They should feel that other care about them and they are a wonderful person no matter what. All those positive saying, positive support, and positive encouragement will help the person. Always have the open communication and help them. After a while, when they get to be successful, they won't worry about their low self esteem because they have change it to a Positive or High Self Esteem. They won't think about those low self esteem once they are successful. They will be happy to be successful with people around that that loves, support and encourage them to be success. I had all of that that made me successful at NTID. I had my family, friends, and many different people that help me be successful.
With the high self esteem I have, I have successfully gotten a High School Diploma even with 11 out of 12 years in Special education grades. I also have two different college degrees: AAS degree in Data Processing at NTID which is now called Applied Computer Technology even through they have different courses now and BS degree from Gallaudet University in Computer Information System. I am also married for 17 years with two children. So my Cerebral Palsy is never in the way of my self esteem with all those support and where I am today.
I hope this blog helps other with their self esteem and get help to be successful. Never let their self esteem get in the way of being a successful person. Since I have high self esteem, the others can to with all the things I mention in this blog.
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Disability and Not Married ????
This topic is for those people who are deaf, have Cerebral Palsy or has any disability and are not married. Don't treat your disability as something that that can prevent you from getting married when you are afraid of it.
First of all, your disability should not prevent you from getting married, Your disability is unique and you have ways to enable yourself even with your disability. There are technologies such as hearing aids, walking canes, crushes, wheelchairs, electric wheelchairs, scooters or whatever devices to help you to be enable and to go do whatever you need to do. Now you have things to make you be or feel Enabled instead of disability or disable. What is next?
Next, go out and makes friends. There are plenty of people that wants to be your friend and they wanted to make friends with you. Before I went to National Technical Institute for the Deaf (NTID) in Rochester NY in 1983, I went to Thomas Nelson Community College in Hampton Va for two years from 1981 to 1983. I didn't socialized and I did not have any real friends to go out with. I spend my Saturdays going to the mall, movies, church and Sunday was for some housework and doing my homework. I was basically living at home and my mother did not like it one bit what I was doing. That was a dull life but I did not mind doing that because I enjoy being single and not worrying about being married. My cousin went to Rochester Institute of Technology and told my mother about NTID. So I decided to apply in the Fall of 1982 and got accept to go in the Fall of 1983. Next my parents finally took me to NTID in August of 1983.
So I arrived at NTID in August 1983. It was amazing that I was home sick right away and I wanted to go home. My Father visit and try to encourage me to stay. I made some friends at the same time. Even one friend I met from NJ, he suggested for me to try the Fall Quarter and give NTID a try. Well, I did met one girl through her boyfriend before the Fall Quarter started. He introduce me to her as his girlfriend. I figure there was nothing wrong with being friends with her. Before the actual Fall Quarter started, NTID offer students a field trip ride to Darien Lake during the Labor Day weekend. I figure I ask the girl of the boyfriend if she wanted to go for fun. Her boyfriend did not wanted go to Darien Lake because it isn't a Six Flag parks with roller coasters rides and so on. He thought it would be boring to do the water slides and so on. Beside the girl, another friend came along who is a male friend. The three of us went to Darien Lake. The girl and I went on the water slides and had fun. The male friend forgot his bathing suit and towel. The girl and I also went on the foot pedal boat and that was fun as well. After coming back from the Darien Lake, the girl ask me if I had plans the following Fridays and Saturday. She really wanted to go out with me to have fun. She said it would not interfere with her relationship with her boyfriend as long as we have fun. So I went with her for about two months and have fun with her doing different things like going to restaurant, movies, bowling and so on. During that time, not once did her boyfriend took her out. He did not even eat meals with her and I did. So by about two months, I was waling back to my dorm. The girl told me to wait and watch her conversation with her friend. With me watching, she told him that she was breaking up with him and she ask me to come back to her room which was a single room. No, we did not have sex or have not yet had the first kiss. She said she had to go out with another guy and his parents who were coming to visit. That was already planned but she told me that she wanted to be with me. Next the relationship.
The girl and I started out slowly and of course I had my first kiss with her. I wanted to know what was it like to kiss a girl and to be in a relationship. The girl and I took our time and did things naturally. Next comes the serious part and now with the girl.
While at NTID, during the second year, the girl asked me to ask her to marry me. I am like shock she wanted a commitment in marriage with me. I didn't think she wanted to deal with my Cerebral Palsy, my deafness and my medical problems. Of course she and I are deaf but my Cerebral Palsy, I did not think she wanted to live with it. But she said, it is my heart and personality that she loves. She said she learn to love and respect me. At first I did not want to get married because of what I had and wanted to live single. It took a while to realized we truly love each other. Next, the present.
My wife and I have been married for 17 years. We had a long distance relationship prior to getting married. She was from Columbus Ohio and I was from Hampton Virginia. We have two wonderful children.
I suggest you to try to go on dates, try a relationship and hopefully get married. Don't let your disability get in the way to get married when in fact you truly love the person you want to married. Your disability should not be an excuse because I thought that was an excuse for me to live a single life and I was wrong.
First of all, your disability should not prevent you from getting married, Your disability is unique and you have ways to enable yourself even with your disability. There are technologies such as hearing aids, walking canes, crushes, wheelchairs, electric wheelchairs, scooters or whatever devices to help you to be enable and to go do whatever you need to do. Now you have things to make you be or feel Enabled instead of disability or disable. What is next?
Next, go out and makes friends. There are plenty of people that wants to be your friend and they wanted to make friends with you. Before I went to National Technical Institute for the Deaf (NTID) in Rochester NY in 1983, I went to Thomas Nelson Community College in Hampton Va for two years from 1981 to 1983. I didn't socialized and I did not have any real friends to go out with. I spend my Saturdays going to the mall, movies, church and Sunday was for some housework and doing my homework. I was basically living at home and my mother did not like it one bit what I was doing. That was a dull life but I did not mind doing that because I enjoy being single and not worrying about being married. My cousin went to Rochester Institute of Technology and told my mother about NTID. So I decided to apply in the Fall of 1982 and got accept to go in the Fall of 1983. Next my parents finally took me to NTID in August of 1983.
So I arrived at NTID in August 1983. It was amazing that I was home sick right away and I wanted to go home. My Father visit and try to encourage me to stay. I made some friends at the same time. Even one friend I met from NJ, he suggested for me to try the Fall Quarter and give NTID a try. Well, I did met one girl through her boyfriend before the Fall Quarter started. He introduce me to her as his girlfriend. I figure there was nothing wrong with being friends with her. Before the actual Fall Quarter started, NTID offer students a field trip ride to Darien Lake during the Labor Day weekend. I figure I ask the girl of the boyfriend if she wanted to go for fun. Her boyfriend did not wanted go to Darien Lake because it isn't a Six Flag parks with roller coasters rides and so on. He thought it would be boring to do the water slides and so on. Beside the girl, another friend came along who is a male friend. The three of us went to Darien Lake. The girl and I went on the water slides and had fun. The male friend forgot his bathing suit and towel. The girl and I also went on the foot pedal boat and that was fun as well. After coming back from the Darien Lake, the girl ask me if I had plans the following Fridays and Saturday. She really wanted to go out with me to have fun. She said it would not interfere with her relationship with her boyfriend as long as we have fun. So I went with her for about two months and have fun with her doing different things like going to restaurant, movies, bowling and so on. During that time, not once did her boyfriend took her out. He did not even eat meals with her and I did. So by about two months, I was waling back to my dorm. The girl told me to wait and watch her conversation with her friend. With me watching, she told him that she was breaking up with him and she ask me to come back to her room which was a single room. No, we did not have sex or have not yet had the first kiss. She said she had to go out with another guy and his parents who were coming to visit. That was already planned but she told me that she wanted to be with me. Next the relationship.
The girl and I started out slowly and of course I had my first kiss with her. I wanted to know what was it like to kiss a girl and to be in a relationship. The girl and I took our time and did things naturally. Next comes the serious part and now with the girl.
While at NTID, during the second year, the girl asked me to ask her to marry me. I am like shock she wanted a commitment in marriage with me. I didn't think she wanted to deal with my Cerebral Palsy, my deafness and my medical problems. Of course she and I are deaf but my Cerebral Palsy, I did not think she wanted to live with it. But she said, it is my heart and personality that she loves. She said she learn to love and respect me. At first I did not want to get married because of what I had and wanted to live single. It took a while to realized we truly love each other. Next, the present.
My wife and I have been married for 17 years. We had a long distance relationship prior to getting married. She was from Columbus Ohio and I was from Hampton Virginia. We have two wonderful children.
I suggest you to try to go on dates, try a relationship and hopefully get married. Don't let your disability get in the way to get married when in fact you truly love the person you want to married. Your disability should not be an excuse because I thought that was an excuse for me to live a single life and I was wrong.
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